In a world where we play king of the hill and fight for our own turf, it’s difficult to yield to other people. We are very aware of when we are offended or wronged (but not so aware of when we offend others), and we are willing to go to great lengths to achieve what we think is “justice”. From a young age we learn to cry “It’s not fair!” - usually meaning that we perceive that something is not fair to us! We drive aggressively and get upset when someone pulls out ahead of us. We take classes to learn assertiveness and how to “look out for number one” (number one being us!). So when we read words like “forgive” and “submit”, it seems to go against the grain of everything we instinctively do.

forgive one another

“...forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” -- (Colossians 3:13)

Read Matthew 18:21-35. What does Jesus teach his disciples about forgiveness?

Read John 21:1-19. What is going on here between Jesus & Peter?

Read 2 Corinthians 2:5-11. What principles does this passage teach us about the process of forgiveness? (Some people think this passage may be related to the situation described in 1 Cor. 5:1-5. We can’t know for sure, but the principles remain the same, either way.)

Does forgiveness mean that there will be no consequences for our actions?

		“What is forgiveness? Forgiveness is to allow the other person not to be God.” Henri Nouwen

What situation or person in your life has been the hardest to forgive?
If you have already forgiven them, what did that process to for you?
If you have not forgiven them, what could bring you to that point?

How do we forgive a person who does not admit that they have done anything wrong?

		Forgiveness says, “I know you love me, but you don’t have to love me unconditionally, because no human being can do that.” To forgive other people for being able to give you only a little love - that’s a hard discipline. To keep asking others for forgiveness because you can only give a little love - that’s a hard discipline, too. It hurts to say to your children, to your wife or your husband, to your friends, that you cannot give them all that you would like to give. Still, that is where community starts to be created, when we come together in a forgiving and undemanding way. Henri Nouwen, “Moving from Solitude to Community to Ministry”

submit to one another

“Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” -- Ephesians 5:21

What is the context of this verse?

Does submission only apply to the marriage relationship?

The following verses describe 3 other situations in which Christians are to submit. What are those situations?

Romans 13:1-5

1 Corinthians 16:15, 16, Hebrews 13:17

1 Peter 2:18 (what would be the modern-day equivalent?)

Why is Philippians 2:3,4 essential to an attitude of submissiveness among Christians?

What would submissiveness look like in your relationships with Christian brothers and sisters?

“submit” from the Greek word "hupotasso" - 1) to arrange under, to subordinate 2) to subject, put in subjection 3) to subject one's self, obey 4) to submit to one's control 5) to yield to one's admonition or advice 6) to obey, be subject ++++ A Greek military term meaning "to arrange [troop divisions] in a military fashion under the command of a leader". In non-military use, it was "a voluntary attitude of giving in, cooperating, assuming responsibility, and carrying a burden".

Do you have a problem with submission? Do people tend to see you as hard to work with, always wanting to have your way, not willing to listen to others? Would you be willing to ask a few friends to “rate” you in this area?